First round: Let us give thanks

Peter Placement Agent: So pleased you could all make it in time for my favourite carve-out.

Paul Pension Fund: I thought one of our Canadian counterparts would have put in an appearance.

Peter Placement Agent: Oh, they did. Last month. I had to send them away with a sandwich, it was really awkward.

Paul Pension Fund: Canadians. Always think they can get in there first.

Fabian Family Office: Terribly nice though…

Peter Placement Agent: Yes, terribly nice.

Bob Buyout: Well I for one am very thankful that you could make it, Paul. I’ve got this great new vehicle we’re looking to launch that you’re going to love…

Peter Placement Agent: Steady on, Bob, you’re doing me out of a job here. And no pitch decks at the dinner table! This is a holiday. Pass the dressing, would you Fabian?

Fabian Family Office: The what?

Peter Placement Agent: The dressing.

Fabian Family Office: Oh, you mean the stuffing.

Francis Fund Formation Lawyer: If the item in question at one point rested inside the turkey, it can be regarded, in most circumstances, as ‘stuffing’. In this particular incidence, without prejudice, I think we can deem the item ‘dressing’.

Peter Placement Agent: Bob does have a point, it’s time to get on to what we’re all thankful for. I’m thankful for all the gazillions of dollars flying around. These days I can raise a fund in my sleep.

Bob Buyout: Hear, hear. And I’m thankful that so many of those dollars are being spent on our portfolio companies. Six exits this year. Six. I can take the next three months off.

Fabian Family Office: Bob, don’t go booking that cruise just yet. We’ve got a co-investment to work on.
Paul Pension Fund: Well I’m thankful that I’ve finally been allowed an assistant. Now somebody else can read those boring reports you all send me.

Francis Fund Formation Lawyer: Just me that’s thankful for the OECD’s latest guidance on BEPS then?

Peter Placement Agent: Nobody’s thankful for that…