Top 10 private equity wishes for 2009
10. Public markets valuations fall a further 20 percent to 30 percent. And stabilise thereafter, so I can price my deal.
9. Private market valuations revert to the traditional discount to public market valuations, so I can close my deal.
8. To all my banker friends: All you have to fear is fear itself! So please lend me what I need, insist on no covenants and allow me to pay interest in kind, not in cash.
7. Will somebody please switch the deal music from slow tango to fast rock-and-roll?
6. Regulators put a strict cap on all banking bonuses – so I can hire their best and their brightest.
5. The industry standardises all fund carry to be on a deal by deal basis.
4. Asian currencies rally – so I can count currency gains in my returns.
3. Don't make me buy at the bottom of the market – and get the next bottom for free.
2. Grant me my wish to be the “Lucky Investor”, not the “Smart Investor”.
1. May all my LPs be able to fund all my capital calls next year.
KY Tang is the chairman and managing partner of Asian private equity firm Affinity Equity Partners.